Module two
FAMILY + HOme
Watch the video below to listen to this page’s content, OR scroll to read the content instead:
I’m not really a big fan of “busy work.” Especially as an entrepreneur who is also a mom. I’ve got plenty else to do with my time, so when I’m spending time on my business, it’s intentional.
This passion for intentionality is what drives my business — it’s how I make all my decisions, how I manage my time, and pretty much the basis of all my services and offerings, including this course.
My business has to be more than just a hobby for me because otherwise, it’s not worth it. It’s not worth the time spent away from my family unless I’m doing something fulfilling and purposeful.
Here’s my perspective: work ethic or creative ability isn’t enough. My business has to be more than just a creative outlet if I’m going to prioritize it over other things in my life. It has to carry a bigger purpose that benefits my family.
Whatever sort of business you design for yourself, you simply need to remember your priorities.
THE PRIORITY EXERCISE
In an effort to avoid adding more “busy work” to your plate that doesn’t light your fire, let’s fine-tune your motivations and get clear on why you’re doing this entrepreneurship thing.
Storytime: Years ago, my husband and I designed a strategy to help us get on the same page in terms of our shared work and entrepreneurial goals. Our twin boys were just about to turn two years old, and I was getting antsy. I’ve always loved to work, and the idea of running my own business intrigued me.
My husband, on the other hand, had never really experienced the whole “find a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life” thing. He’s had jobs he’s enjoyed more than others, but his dream looks different than mine — it revolves around time spent as a family more than time spent on personal development or work.
What fascinated me is that we were united in our goals for our family, but totally out of sync with our priorities.
While I cherish my role as a stay-at-home mom, it doesn’t offer me the fulfillment or value I thought it would when I was growing up. I’m so grateful for this opportunity to raise my kids, but I simultaneously crave entrepreneurial pursuits that I can call my own.
The Priority Exercise is designed to allow you to reflect on which family- and house-supporting tasks serve you more than others. You can take it with your partner if you’d like, and compare answers. My husband and I quickly realized I found more joy and fulfillment in working than he did, and he was wanting more time with the kids, something I had in spades.
Sometimes, all it takes is a simple exercise to point out something so clearly. Set aside some time to work through The Priority Exercise on your own to see where you can make tiny improvements in your daily efforts that compound over time into a life that more closely resembles your deepest ambition.
This activity is a great way for you to “check in” with yourself and make sure you’re doing all you can to “find work you love” or at least find a balance for things in your life that serve you and your family.
Now obviously, part of being an adult is that you’re going to have to do some things you don’t want to do. But, once you recognize the value of finding joy in how you spend your time, it might be easier for you to justify outsourcing some tasks or prioritizing how you spend your time differently.
Maybe you realize your desire to outsource some babysitting is outranked by your desire to never have to clean your kitchen, and you choose to hire a housekeeper instead. Or maybe you realize that your partner doesn’t mind meal prepping or shopping for groceries as much as you do.
Ultimately, the point of this exercise is that you can be intentional about how you spend your unstructured, un-devoted time and choose what having the best of both worlds looks like for you. Loving to work or pursuing your entrepreneurial dreams doesn’t mean you love your children any less. It just means you’ve got to get your priorities in alignment so you’re working purposefully in a way that serves both your family and your business.
The realizations and takeaways from this exercise may not be groundbreaking. They’ll likely seem predictable, but the point is that you take action (the last phase of the exercise) to shift your habits or schedule bit by bit so that you avoid falling victim to the demands and responsibilities of life and are able to get closer to living your dream life. Don’t let your schedule control you — plan intentionally to find fulfillment and a better balance on a day-to-day basis.
YOUR SCHEDULE
How often do you find yourself proclaiming, “Man, we’ve just been so busy!” Life is busy. I get it. We’ve all been there, and likely still are! But one really important aspect of being a creative mama is remembering this:
Busyness isn’t a badge of honor.
There is a difference between a busy life and a full one. Whether you spend your days always at home with a newborn or running around town shuttling kids between school, appointments, and extracurriculars, life gets busy and it’s easy for time to slip by unnoticed and underutilized.
Consider a glass mason jar and how you might fill it with water. The capacity of this jar can’t be altered (just like the 24 hours in a day can’t be altered). If you leave the jar unattended, it may fill up on its own with rainwater. The water represents all the things you do that are out of your control. If you don’t intentionally plan what you do with your time, life will find a way to fill your schedule for you, right?
Now, what if you wanted a say in what occurred during your day? You might choose a few rocks or larger pebbles and stones to represent your various priorities (family time, personal development, self-care, etc.) and place them in the jar. Your jar is still going to fill with rainwater by the end of the day. But by intentionally filling the space yourself with those rocks and pebbles, you got to have more of a say in what your day looked like.
This analogy works really well for a variety of scenarios, like budgeting, evaluating your mental health, and deciding which friends to spend time with, but for our purposes, let’s talk about how it affects your schedule.
I maintain a shared family calendar with important things scheduled out, like extracurricular activities, date nights, and even chores scheduled on a recurring basis. This helps me see what’s coming up as I plan my to-do list and helps other members of my family schedule their time, too.
Learn more about managing your schedule using the workbook linked below.
Here are a few examples of how managing your schedule would look when applied beyond your family calendar to your business agenda:
If you find yourself running out of time to perform any marketing activities for your business, make sure they’re on your calendar at the start of the month and commit to them before you even get started on the month’s activities.
If you’ve been procrastinating on some form of business development, like a course or mentorship, make sure the funds for that have been planned for in your budget prior to other spending and block out the time on your schedule to make sure you’ve got the time to study. No excuses!
If you are continually feeling burned out by your business, but you’re too worried about taking a step back and the effect it will have on your continued success, scale back the time you’re spending on your business each day and fill that time with other things like self-care and personal development.
YOUR HOME
Beyond your schedule and the time allotted to pursue any creative venture apart from your family responsibilities, your environment can play a huge role in your success.
Many people feel more creative in a clean, organized space. Admittedly, I’m a bit of a neat freak, and a minimalist when it comes to decor and toys and such, but that’s all by design — the less stuff there is, the less time I’m spending picking it all up.
You certainly don’t have to do things my way, but I encourage you to take a look at the environment you’ll most often be working in and consider how you can streamline or organize the space to better serve you. Here are a few ideas:
Move a side table next to the couch or chair where you’ll be working while you watch your kids play.
Curate the toys you have out at a time and package the rest up to swap out after a few weeks.
Create a chore routine (for just you, or include your family) that’s manageable and easy to stick to so you can ensure your workspace stays clean.
There is a whole world of strategy when it comes to keeping your home a safe, engaging, and comforting environment (notice I didn’t say clean — it’s impossible to always be picture-perfect with littles in the home!). But if you’re dedicated to the function of your space and how it applies to your abilities to run a structured, functional business, you’ll realize just how big an impact your environment has on your mindset.
Because I am totally a product of my environment, and keeping a clean house is actually a passion of mine, I developed a House Maintenance schedule that works for me. You can download my exact House Maintenance schedule here and modify it to fit your home and family. I’ve set recurring calendar events at the stated frequencies as a way to keep track of what chores I need to do next each day so nothing gets forgotten (looking at you, oil changes!).
Obviously, my maintenance schedule is specific to my family and won’t work exactly for everyone, but I’m sharing it in the hopes that it speeds things up as you develop your own!
And if rotating schedules are your thing, feel free to swipe my Meal Planning Rotation as well — approved for picky eaters AND low budgets!
I’m continually working towards a good work/life balance as a mother, and because of this, I find I am much more purposeful with my time. I’m constantly striving for efficiency, not only in all areas of my business but also in my personal life.
When you don’t have the luxury of unlimited hours to spend growing your new venture, or with your family, you have to hunker down and bust out as much work as you can in as little time as you can so that you can jump back to the other side of the scale and put your focus there, too.
I believe that adding a little more efficiency and intentionality into your home and family routines actually improves the value of your business. It makes your time spent away from your family that much more focused and intentional. After all, we all have the same number of hours in our week.
One essential strategy to finding a good balance is just figuring out the most important things to prioritize.
Work/life balance IS attainable. It’s not meant to make you feel guilty.
Look at it this way — you’re probably always going to feel like whatever you’re not spending your time on is playing second fiddle. But, instead of feeling guilty that you’re not spending more time with your family or more time on your business, look at them as parts of a whole.
You’re building a whole, full life for you and your family. You’re the leader of your crew, and you’re setting a beautiful example of a healthy balance as you manage all aspects of what makes you and your purpose unique.